If a book store a pet store and a grocery store combined I would never shop anywhere again. What more do you need in this world to buy beyond good food a good book and maybe a warm puppy?
So on this high holy day of shopping I avoid the Malls like the plague. To show you how crazy some people are: My sister in Ohio wanted a 200 dollar TV. Well the TV is on sale for 200. Anyway, the sale started at five a.m. so a friend of hers arrived at the store at four a.m. to grab one for her. But they were already sold out. How does this happen if the sale does not start until 5? Well it seems the TVs actually were removed from the shelves by customers from midnight (when the store opened ) until three a.m. when the last TV left the shelf. People then carted the TVs around in their shopping carts until 5. So some people pushed a TV around a store for 5 hours to get the sale. Are they kidding?
But one of my friends who inexplicable loves to shop, commented that shopping online would still yield great Black Friday sales all without the crowds. I foolishly believed her and just spent about 4 hours (only a tiny exaggeration) fighting with both Amazon and Victoria's Secret to order Christmas gifts and get the sales.
After all the rigmarole I started to wish my only job was moving a TV around for 5 hours.
Amazon always tries to use an outdated debit card to pay for my orders, even though I removed the card both last year and AGAIN today. To add to the frustration when you order from Amazon they may send the wrong info out to 3 or more businesses, thus requiring me to spend hours trying to fix their mistake. Of course Amazon wisely posts no phone number to reach them. They are no fools.
How is it that Amazon remembers that 3 years ago I ordered a book about goats and other small livestock, but they cannot remember the proper credit card number?
Victoria's Secret initially offered a more pleasant shopping experience. They even had a number of free items you could put a special code in to get. Of course the timing of the special code was critical. 5 times I tried to get the info to come out correctly during the checkout process. Eventually I conceded defeat and called a live person. She did help but I think that I may now have a Victoria's Secret credit card. Or I signed away one of my kids. It is all an exhausting blur. Oh and even though on my online screen it said I scored a free tote bag, since the order had to be finished over the phone they ran out of totes. No tote for me...
I am sitting here totally exhausted. You would think I had walked the 8 miles to the Mall and then shopped. Maybe next year I will institute an all gift card Christmas!!! Any takers?
Friday, November 26, 2010
Saturday, November 20, 2010
Thanks a lot
Saturday, November 20, 2010
Thanksgiving songfest
For as long as I can remember the kindergarteners in Carver have entertained their families by performing in the Thanksgiving Songfest in the primary gym. The poor parents all squish themselves on the risers, latecomers end up ringing the gym. Many bring younger sibs and it is like watching clowns holding greased monkeys the way parents contort trying to keep impatient toddlers, in slippery winter coats, from plunging out of laps and onto the floor.
The K kids sing about 6 songs, all Thanksgiving related. Most of the songs have little hand gestures and some even have dance steps. There is even a song about the color of autumn leaves and as their color is mentioned the children wave gauzy scarves up and down. What a hoot. I spent the entire time during that song muttering sotto voce, "get the scarf out of your mouth, off your nose, off your head...."
Some of the songs get stuck in your head like an earwhig.....'Turkey trot trot trot across the lot lot lot feeling fine fine fine until Thanksgiving time' rattles around in my brain......
"Thanks a lot" by Raffi is the closing song and of course it always brings a tear to my eye as the children so earnestly sing it to their parents. It is a nice song for all of us to take time to remember this time of year.
Thanks a lot Thanks for the sun in the sky
Thanks a lot Thanksfor the clouds so high
Thanks a lot Thanks for the whispering wind
Thanks a lot Thanks for the birds in the spring
Thanks a lot Thanks for the moonlit night
Thanks a lot Thanks for the stars so bright
Thanks a lot Thanks for the wonder in me
Thanks a lot Thanks for the way I feel
Thanks for the animals
Thanks for the land
Thanks for the people everywhere
Thanks a lot Thanks for all I've got........
Thanksgiving songfest
For as long as I can remember the kindergarteners in Carver have entertained their families by performing in the Thanksgiving Songfest in the primary gym. The poor parents all squish themselves on the risers, latecomers end up ringing the gym. Many bring younger sibs and it is like watching clowns holding greased monkeys the way parents contort trying to keep impatient toddlers, in slippery winter coats, from plunging out of laps and onto the floor.
The K kids sing about 6 songs, all Thanksgiving related. Most of the songs have little hand gestures and some even have dance steps. There is even a song about the color of autumn leaves and as their color is mentioned the children wave gauzy scarves up and down. What a hoot. I spent the entire time during that song muttering sotto voce, "get the scarf out of your mouth, off your nose, off your head...."
Some of the songs get stuck in your head like an earwhig.....'Turkey trot trot trot across the lot lot lot feeling fine fine fine until Thanksgiving time' rattles around in my brain......
"Thanks a lot" by Raffi is the closing song and of course it always brings a tear to my eye as the children so earnestly sing it to their parents. It is a nice song for all of us to take time to remember this time of year.
Thanks a lot Thanks for the sun in the sky
Thanks a lot Thanksfor the clouds so high
Thanks a lot Thanks for the whispering wind
Thanks a lot Thanks for the birds in the spring
Thanks a lot Thanks for the moonlit night
Thanks a lot Thanks for the stars so bright
Thanks a lot Thanks for the wonder in me
Thanks a lot Thanks for the way I feel
Thanks for the animals
Thanks for the land
Thanks for the people everywhere
Thanks a lot Thanks for all I've got........
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Congress won't help the unemployed....
Billions, we spent BILLIONS to bail out banks and the automotive industry, but no few million for the long term unemployed. The banks and other wall street bailouts did things wrong. The unemployed got up and went to work everyday.....
Donnie has had a job since he was 14 years old. What the hell does he do now?
Donnie has had a job since he was 14 years old. What the hell does he do now?
A small favor to ask
Enhancing English Language Learning in Elementary Classrooms, Guiding Readers and Writers Grades 3-6, Literacy Helping Children Construct Meaning, Starting Out Right A
Guide to Promoting Children's reading Success, Best Practices in Literacy Instruction, and finally Learning to Read Lessons from Exemplary First Grade Classrooms. This has been my spare time reading this past week. In an effort to immerse myself in all things Literacy I have moved away from the Internet and into instruction books.
There are a few more books coming tomorrow. I also have 150 flashcards of Literacy terms. I also have a dozen practise exam tests, not to mention notes from said exams.
I have the encouragement from friends, family, blog fans, and any number of educators (thanks Linda, thanks Jane.) I have the support of my family and I have 3 other passing MTEL exams under my belt.
Not only that but I have actually put into practice much of what I have been studying, first as a one on one special education para and just today as the kindergarten sub to the sweetest group of kids. I also have stress and anxiety up the wazoo!
So tomorrow nite Don and I are using a last year's Christmas present from the kids. We are doing free dinner and a movie with De Lux tickets. We are going to see Morning Glory.
After studying for 2 months and cramming this last week I am going to take the night before the test off to relax and enjoy and think about something else besides phonics and whole language, semantics and syntax.
I do not think I have ever sweated out a test as much as this one, but I will be damned if I am going to let it so get to me that I freeze during the testing. So the night before the MTELS I will treat body and soul to good company, good food, and a good show.
All my best laid plans of not getting anxious did not work, it just spurred me on to study harder. But tomorrow night I will stop trying to stick one more fact into my overwhelmed cranium and enjoy a good laugh.
Come Saturday morning I am sure you will have plenty of important things to think about. Heaven knows this country needs a lot of thought and prayer. But if you have time to throw a positve thought my way it would be humbly appreciated. Look at it this way, good vibes from you could be just what it is needed to get a passing score and then you will not need to put up with my near constant fretting over it:>) So truly you will be doing yourself a favor, and really who deserves one more?
Guide to Promoting Children's reading Success, Best Practices in Literacy Instruction, and finally Learning to Read Lessons from Exemplary First Grade Classrooms. This has been my spare time reading this past week. In an effort to immerse myself in all things Literacy I have moved away from the Internet and into instruction books.
There are a few more books coming tomorrow. I also have 150 flashcards of Literacy terms. I also have a dozen practise exam tests, not to mention notes from said exams.
I have the encouragement from friends, family, blog fans, and any number of educators (thanks Linda, thanks Jane.) I have the support of my family and I have 3 other passing MTEL exams under my belt.
Not only that but I have actually put into practice much of what I have been studying, first as a one on one special education para and just today as the kindergarten sub to the sweetest group of kids. I also have stress and anxiety up the wazoo!
So tomorrow nite Don and I are using a last year's Christmas present from the kids. We are doing free dinner and a movie with De Lux tickets. We are going to see Morning Glory.
After studying for 2 months and cramming this last week I am going to take the night before the test off to relax and enjoy and think about something else besides phonics and whole language, semantics and syntax.
I do not think I have ever sweated out a test as much as this one, but I will be damned if I am going to let it so get to me that I freeze during the testing. So the night before the MTELS I will treat body and soul to good company, good food, and a good show.
All my best laid plans of not getting anxious did not work, it just spurred me on to study harder. But tomorrow night I will stop trying to stick one more fact into my overwhelmed cranium and enjoy a good laugh.
Come Saturday morning I am sure you will have plenty of important things to think about. Heaven knows this country needs a lot of thought and prayer. But if you have time to throw a positve thought my way it would be humbly appreciated. Look at it this way, good vibes from you could be just what it is needed to get a passing score and then you will not need to put up with my near constant fretting over it:>) So truly you will be doing yourself a favor, and really who deserves one more?
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Parental involvement in school
You often hear from teachers that parents just do not do what they are suppose to. I was at also at a PTO meeting when a parent complained about how sad it was that the ball fields are full of involved parents yet they do not come to school for related school meetings like PTO.
I always figure everyone is like our family and so busy that they have to choose just a few of the many wonderful opportunities our kids are exposed to, to support. For instance the years I taught CCD and helped out with the church youth group (and Don did the youth Mass music) we did not really do PTO things. Some years we can be 4H leaders or softball coaches. Other years just getting the kids to games and meetings on time is more than enough.
But lately I do not know, I guess a sort of pessimism is starting to creep in. For instance there is a most wonderful kindergarten teacher in our school (OK they are all wonderful.) She was very sad because: every year her class prepares a big Thanksgiving feast. Lessons for weeks revolve around it. Parents send in food of course but the whole concept of the first Thanksgiving, giving thanks, cooperative planning, numbers, reading, on and on all combine to give the kids a wonderful experience. But this year when she sent the note home asking for contributions, not a single parent wrote back. Not one in a class of 24.
All of our kindergartens are preparing a songfest for our parents this Friday afternoon. The kids have been practising their songs and dances. Imagine learning how to do the 'turkey trot' when you are 5 years old and standing on a riser!
I can remember missing the songfest once or twice due to work commitments or because I had no car. But I think most parents would be eager to go if they could make it. I hope os because the kids are so thrilled at the thought of singing for their families.
Today one of the sweetest boys clapped his hands with glee after the chorus (consisting of 2 kindergarten classes, but tomorrow all 6 classes rehearse together!) "This is my first concert I have ever done, " he explained. The aide from the other class gave him a big smile. She had been vaguely aggravated by getting kids to stand up, face forward, sing loud but not too loud, tying shoes, etc all the things you have to do to keep 50 5 year olds going at the same time.
She has prepared for many a songfest before, this certainly was not her first time through. (I am pretty sure she also has 4 or 5 kids.) But the honest joy on my little guys face as he concentrated on making his blue scarf go up and down in time to the music, moved her. You cannot help but be inspired by children just learning to read and write and discover the world.They are so happy. Why wouldn't everyone want to share in that?
I always think parents have such a hard time with the homeowrk burden that it sours their willingness to help out at school. Plus maybe if you did not have a good experience at school you would not want to go and be reminded of that? Maybe your kid is not doing you proud and you do not want to publicly admit he is yours?
But our children are in school for at least 12 years, 14 if your count preschool and kindergarten. Imagine if every family only did one year of real involvement for each kid they had. One year to chaperone or classroom volunteer. One year to go to each of the 9 PTO meetings, or attend every band concert....imagine how rich our schools would be and how happy our kids.....
I always figure everyone is like our family and so busy that they have to choose just a few of the many wonderful opportunities our kids are exposed to, to support. For instance the years I taught CCD and helped out with the church youth group (and Don did the youth Mass music) we did not really do PTO things. Some years we can be 4H leaders or softball coaches. Other years just getting the kids to games and meetings on time is more than enough.
But lately I do not know, I guess a sort of pessimism is starting to creep in. For instance there is a most wonderful kindergarten teacher in our school (OK they are all wonderful.) She was very sad because: every year her class prepares a big Thanksgiving feast. Lessons for weeks revolve around it. Parents send in food of course but the whole concept of the first Thanksgiving, giving thanks, cooperative planning, numbers, reading, on and on all combine to give the kids a wonderful experience. But this year when she sent the note home asking for contributions, not a single parent wrote back. Not one in a class of 24.
All of our kindergartens are preparing a songfest for our parents this Friday afternoon. The kids have been practising their songs and dances. Imagine learning how to do the 'turkey trot' when you are 5 years old and standing on a riser!
I can remember missing the songfest once or twice due to work commitments or because I had no car. But I think most parents would be eager to go if they could make it. I hope os because the kids are so thrilled at the thought of singing for their families.
Today one of the sweetest boys clapped his hands with glee after the chorus (consisting of 2 kindergarten classes, but tomorrow all 6 classes rehearse together!) "This is my first concert I have ever done, " he explained. The aide from the other class gave him a big smile. She had been vaguely aggravated by getting kids to stand up, face forward, sing loud but not too loud, tying shoes, etc all the things you have to do to keep 50 5 year olds going at the same time.
She has prepared for many a songfest before, this certainly was not her first time through. (I am pretty sure she also has 4 or 5 kids.) But the honest joy on my little guys face as he concentrated on making his blue scarf go up and down in time to the music, moved her. You cannot help but be inspired by children just learning to read and write and discover the world.They are so happy. Why wouldn't everyone want to share in that?
I always think parents have such a hard time with the homeowrk burden that it sours their willingness to help out at school. Plus maybe if you did not have a good experience at school you would not want to go and be reminded of that? Maybe your kid is not doing you proud and you do not want to publicly admit he is yours?
But our children are in school for at least 12 years, 14 if your count preschool and kindergarten. Imagine if every family only did one year of real involvement for each kid they had. One year to chaperone or classroom volunteer. One year to go to each of the 9 PTO meetings, or attend every band concert....imagine how rich our schools would be and how happy our kids.....
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Running the race
5 miles along the Atwood reservoir, on bog roads that wind through the acres of maroon and weave through pine forests, The Edaville Rail Trail has to be the prettiest place to run.
Jogging past the little wooden village under the watchful eye of a wooden Santa- naughty and nice list in hand- is certainly an experience not to be missed. It was especially lovely this year with the bright sunny day. (Last year's race was run in a gray fog with sideways freezing rain!)
There were many many more runners this year. 450 tshirts were handed out and dozens more runners registered too late to receive one. I think the combination of mild weather and the probable sale of Edaville Railroad led to the high turnout of participants. Could this year's race be the last?
I hoped to finish the race which I did. I had to walk quite a bit of it of course. But I power walked, no casual stroll for me. Surprisingly I even managed to run more than I walked and finished in 68 minutes, 9 minutes slower than last year's stormy effort. But I did not come in last place.
My neck was number one focus for the entire run. There was no way I was going to foolishly risk a setback. It certainly made itself known to me and today it is very very tight. But I did it. Four months after surgery, seven months after blowing the discs, I managed to participate in a five mile road race.
Today all sorts of muscles are aching and I moan and groan with almost every step and reach. But it is a good kind of sore. The muscle building sore and I am so grateful I was healthy enough to push myself.
I am more determined than ever to get my body in the best shape possible and achieve a healthy maintainable weight. 2010 was maybe not really my year perhaps. But these last couple months will be amazing and 2011 is sure to be the year I wear skinny clothes!
How lucky I am though to have the chance to run again after such a serious injury. How amazing is this human body we have been given and what wondrous things it can accomplish with some effort and determination.
Jogging past the little wooden village under the watchful eye of a wooden Santa- naughty and nice list in hand- is certainly an experience not to be missed. It was especially lovely this year with the bright sunny day. (Last year's race was run in a gray fog with sideways freezing rain!)
There were many many more runners this year. 450 tshirts were handed out and dozens more runners registered too late to receive one. I think the combination of mild weather and the probable sale of Edaville Railroad led to the high turnout of participants. Could this year's race be the last?
I hoped to finish the race which I did. I had to walk quite a bit of it of course. But I power walked, no casual stroll for me. Surprisingly I even managed to run more than I walked and finished in 68 minutes, 9 minutes slower than last year's stormy effort. But I did not come in last place.
My neck was number one focus for the entire run. There was no way I was going to foolishly risk a setback. It certainly made itself known to me and today it is very very tight. But I did it. Four months after surgery, seven months after blowing the discs, I managed to participate in a five mile road race.
Today all sorts of muscles are aching and I moan and groan with almost every step and reach. But it is a good kind of sore. The muscle building sore and I am so grateful I was healthy enough to push myself.
I am more determined than ever to get my body in the best shape possible and achieve a healthy maintainable weight. 2010 was maybe not really my year perhaps. But these last couple months will be amazing and 2011 is sure to be the year I wear skinny clothes!
How lucky I am though to have the chance to run again after such a serious injury. How amazing is this human body we have been given and what wondrous things it can accomplish with some effort and determination.
Friday, November 12, 2010
Anticipation/dread/perspective
Since last night I have had one of those throbbing one sided headaches you get when your sinuses back up. You know the kind, you bend over and think your head might pop off....not sick, No fever or anything dramatic. A little tired I suppose but really how can that ever be counted as a symptom for anything?
Add to the head throb some nerves about tomorrow's race. What if I am indeed the slowest person for instance and the volunteers get mad? To really go all the way, after studying for 2 hours this afternoon for next weeks tests' I decided to tackle the two practise essays....and could not coherently answer either one. Yikes as my friend Margo would say.
Did I mention that in about 2o minutes I will have a half dozen or so teenage girls over for Nikki's birthday? Oh ya when I do the anticipation/dread thing I go all out, there is no halfway anything around here.
My only true comfort is the thought that at least I did not have to take the boys out of the house to go to the church bazaar and then bowling. Donnie lost that coin toss.
The essay mind failure is what put me over the edge tho, not the other stuff. I was going to try some deep yoga breathing but since I can only breath in and out my left nostril...
Ok time to set up a reward system. Lets see....the girls are having pizza and make your own sundaes so that is a mind field for my diet. I will need to stay clear of them. It is a sacrifice to remain downstairs while they party hardy, but I will just have to make do.
I still need to do an hour of aerobics. Oh btw I had a fun PT session today at the gym and we went over some of the weight machines so that was really good. OK for aerobics I will turn on some fifties rock and roll and boogie on down in my room.
I cannot truly totally let go of the flop sweat over the upcoming tests. But I am gonna take a break from further study tonight. Maybe I will search online for various teacher prep and Master's programs. It will feel like I am doing something important without the stress of having to do something important.
Perspective is in the form of a few dear friends. One of my friends who is the sole wager earner was just laid off. My nephew is in harm's way over in Afghanistan so his mother must never ever sleep at all. And one of my most dearest friends is in the middle of a very messy divorce. 4 months ago she was planning her 25th wedding anniversary, and now boom.
I shall keep these 3 friends in mind everytime I think my life is more than full of anxiety. Tomorrow when I run I will do the Catholic thing and offer the hard parts up for them. My husband may be out of work but he is not the sole breadwinner of our family. My children may be annoying but they are safe here, not over in the midst of a war. Don and I may be in the middle of a messy marriage, but it is a true marriage and we are in this together.
Hope everyone has a relaxing evening. Those girls upstairs are getting good and loud but their shouts of laughter and stomping dancing feet are a very good thing.
Add to the head throb some nerves about tomorrow's race. What if I am indeed the slowest person for instance and the volunteers get mad? To really go all the way, after studying for 2 hours this afternoon for next weeks tests' I decided to tackle the two practise essays....and could not coherently answer either one. Yikes as my friend Margo would say.
Did I mention that in about 2o minutes I will have a half dozen or so teenage girls over for Nikki's birthday? Oh ya when I do the anticipation/dread thing I go all out, there is no halfway anything around here.
My only true comfort is the thought that at least I did not have to take the boys out of the house to go to the church bazaar and then bowling. Donnie lost that coin toss.
The essay mind failure is what put me over the edge tho, not the other stuff. I was going to try some deep yoga breathing but since I can only breath in and out my left nostril...
Ok time to set up a reward system. Lets see....the girls are having pizza and make your own sundaes so that is a mind field for my diet. I will need to stay clear of them. It is a sacrifice to remain downstairs while they party hardy, but I will just have to make do.
I still need to do an hour of aerobics. Oh btw I had a fun PT session today at the gym and we went over some of the weight machines so that was really good. OK for aerobics I will turn on some fifties rock and roll and boogie on down in my room.
I cannot truly totally let go of the flop sweat over the upcoming tests. But I am gonna take a break from further study tonight. Maybe I will search online for various teacher prep and Master's programs. It will feel like I am doing something important without the stress of having to do something important.
Perspective is in the form of a few dear friends. One of my friends who is the sole wager earner was just laid off. My nephew is in harm's way over in Afghanistan so his mother must never ever sleep at all. And one of my most dearest friends is in the middle of a very messy divorce. 4 months ago she was planning her 25th wedding anniversary, and now boom.
I shall keep these 3 friends in mind everytime I think my life is more than full of anxiety. Tomorrow when I run I will do the Catholic thing and offer the hard parts up for them. My husband may be out of work but he is not the sole breadwinner of our family. My children may be annoying but they are safe here, not over in the midst of a war. Don and I may be in the middle of a messy marriage, but it is a true marriage and we are in this together.
Hope everyone has a relaxing evening. Those girls upstairs are getting good and loud but their shouts of laughter and stomping dancing feet are a very good thing.
Thursday, November 11, 2010
Big Run on Saturday
Today as I walked/ran and tried not to get blown over by the howling wind, my mind wandered to the Edaville Rail Trail road race that I will be participating in less than 48 hours away. One of the techniques competitors use is to visualize the course and yourself running it.
As you run over the route in your mind you pay close attention to certain spots, a steep hill for instance, or a particularly challenging road surface. (In this case soggy bog roads as most of the race has you going around the bogs.) The point is to really envision the sights, smells, and feelings etc. The richer the visualisation,the more beneficial.
I also like to focus on both the start and the finish. I tend to get very nervous just before the race starts (this will be my fifth race so I guess nervousness comes with the territory!) But the last thing I need is to have my heart rate zooming before I have jogged a step. By visualising the race's start I can work on calming myself and then use that knowledge in the race. Same with the finish line. In 3 of the 4 races for instance I was able to do a final burst of speed to cross the line.
The one race I could not was last year's Edaville race, but I never imagined running in a torrential downpour that soaked me to my bones,the way last year's race turned out. All week long I have been trying to envision the final bit of the racecourse and trying to picture myself giving that last burst of energy. But of course it has been bitterly cold and rainy around here and my body rebels at the very thought of running in that situation.
Today however it was dryer for my run and the sun even peaked out a few times. This made it somewhat easier to do my race visualisation and apparently race day will be sunny and 50 and no wind.
I am also trying to apply visualisation to next weeks big MTEL exams and I often use visualisation to help with my weight watcher journey. All this time spent in my head sort of has me wondering about that whole 'live in the moment' adage!
I suppose all the self help mantras are handy but you certainly can employ only a couple of techniques at a time or make yourself batty.
My reward for Saturdys's big run is a road trip up to Danvers to see some friends I have not been able to see in a year. I have been trying to be extra careful with my food choices this week so that I have extra calories for our Friend's Thanksgiving Feast.
I think I have the anxiety thing under better controltoo than a few post previous. Then again all this visualisation takes up too much time to waste on needless worry.
As you run over the route in your mind you pay close attention to certain spots, a steep hill for instance, or a particularly challenging road surface. (In this case soggy bog roads as most of the race has you going around the bogs.) The point is to really envision the sights, smells, and feelings etc. The richer the visualisation,the more beneficial.
I also like to focus on both the start and the finish. I tend to get very nervous just before the race starts (this will be my fifth race so I guess nervousness comes with the territory!) But the last thing I need is to have my heart rate zooming before I have jogged a step. By visualising the race's start I can work on calming myself and then use that knowledge in the race. Same with the finish line. In 3 of the 4 races for instance I was able to do a final burst of speed to cross the line.
The one race I could not was last year's Edaville race, but I never imagined running in a torrential downpour that soaked me to my bones,the way last year's race turned out. All week long I have been trying to envision the final bit of the racecourse and trying to picture myself giving that last burst of energy. But of course it has been bitterly cold and rainy around here and my body rebels at the very thought of running in that situation.
Today however it was dryer for my run and the sun even peaked out a few times. This made it somewhat easier to do my race visualisation and apparently race day will be sunny and 50 and no wind.
I am also trying to apply visualisation to next weeks big MTEL exams and I often use visualisation to help with my weight watcher journey. All this time spent in my head sort of has me wondering about that whole 'live in the moment' adage!
I suppose all the self help mantras are handy but you certainly can employ only a couple of techniques at a time or make yourself batty.
My reward for Saturdys's big run is a road trip up to Danvers to see some friends I have not been able to see in a year. I have been trying to be extra careful with my food choices this week so that I have extra calories for our Friend's Thanksgiving Feast.
I think I have the anxiety thing under better controltoo than a few post previous. Then again all this visualisation takes up too much time to waste on needless worry.
Tuesday, November 09, 2010
Pulling myself up by my bootstraps
OK, hitting those books like they are a punching bag! Today I have been getting down definitions. Semantics, pragmatics, othography, syntax, phonology, etymology, morhpology, and discourse. Whew!
In addition I have been giving some thought about how my last night's blog about studying for a test (ok a BIG test, 2 BIG tests) turned into a panicked worrying over Don's long term unemployment.
Since my mother's death 8 years ago my body's response to a worry, real or imagined is to resist letting go of the panic. What I mean is, say I am worrying about driving to a new place on the highway. This for me is a cause of some fretting as I am not a big highway driver and I get lost very easily. Pre-mom's death, I would be clear what the exact worry was, do what I could to lessen it (say get exact directions, have someone else drive me, pray to St Christopher, that sort of thing) then I would offer myself some sort of prize or incentive. Like I would remind myself that on the way home was a Dairy Queen, or a Borders where I could get a book for fun. Having addressed the problem worry, done what I could to solve it, and then rewarded myself, I could then let go of almost all the anxiety.
However post-mom's death, I have a worry, try to use what I have used in the past, then just as I am releasing the worry my mind reminds me of something else bigger to fret about! So I have had to make a true concentrated effort to get out of that rat race of anxious thought patterns. (Honestly a few months after her death I went on depression/anxiety medication for about a year to help the brain stuff function better. Thankfully after a year I found I could deal with issues in the way that always worked for me. Except every once in a while when things really get hectic and I find my brain slipping into this pattern.)
So last night as I powered away on the elliptical it occurred to me that I am falling into that habit again. Truly I had wanted to blog about the tests to reduce worry but just as the worry for that was ebbing my brain began haunting me about the looming unemployment crisis.
So for now I have decided to let go of the unemployment sutff and let Don deal with letters to congressman and job searches etc. I am focusing this next week and a half on 2 big things, the Edaville Road Race this Saturday and then the MTELS next Saturday.
Still leaves me plenty of time to worry about other things later! Meanwhile I have studying to do and working out to do and that should be enough for one person!
Wight Watchers is going well, my workouts are getting more challenging, and I really have learned a ton of reading comprehension and literacy challenges!
I will get my brain engaged in thoughts that move me ahead and fulfill me and not ones that drag me down! So there. Fie and a pox on all anxious thoughts, I have got work to do:>)
In addition I have been giving some thought about how my last night's blog about studying for a test (ok a BIG test, 2 BIG tests) turned into a panicked worrying over Don's long term unemployment.
Since my mother's death 8 years ago my body's response to a worry, real or imagined is to resist letting go of the panic. What I mean is, say I am worrying about driving to a new place on the highway. This for me is a cause of some fretting as I am not a big highway driver and I get lost very easily. Pre-mom's death, I would be clear what the exact worry was, do what I could to lessen it (say get exact directions, have someone else drive me, pray to St Christopher, that sort of thing) then I would offer myself some sort of prize or incentive. Like I would remind myself that on the way home was a Dairy Queen, or a Borders where I could get a book for fun. Having addressed the problem worry, done what I could to solve it, and then rewarded myself, I could then let go of almost all the anxiety.
However post-mom's death, I have a worry, try to use what I have used in the past, then just as I am releasing the worry my mind reminds me of something else bigger to fret about! So I have had to make a true concentrated effort to get out of that rat race of anxious thought patterns. (Honestly a few months after her death I went on depression/anxiety medication for about a year to help the brain stuff function better. Thankfully after a year I found I could deal with issues in the way that always worked for me. Except every once in a while when things really get hectic and I find my brain slipping into this pattern.)
So last night as I powered away on the elliptical it occurred to me that I am falling into that habit again. Truly I had wanted to blog about the tests to reduce worry but just as the worry for that was ebbing my brain began haunting me about the looming unemployment crisis.
So for now I have decided to let go of the unemployment sutff and let Don deal with letters to congressman and job searches etc. I am focusing this next week and a half on 2 big things, the Edaville Road Race this Saturday and then the MTELS next Saturday.
Still leaves me plenty of time to worry about other things later! Meanwhile I have studying to do and working out to do and that should be enough for one person!
Wight Watchers is going well, my workouts are getting more challenging, and I really have learned a ton of reading comprehension and literacy challenges!
I will get my brain engaged in thoughts that move me ahead and fulfill me and not ones that drag me down! So there. Fie and a pox on all anxious thoughts, I have got work to do:>)
Saturday, November 06, 2010
Studying
In two weeks I am taking the Foundations of Reading Test and the Reading Specialist test as part of the MTEL licencing procedure. I need the first test to receive my preliminary licence as a prek-2nd grade teacher (with and without disabilities.) Since I was already scheduled to take a test in the morning my thought was to take an afternoon subject test to increase my desire-ability as a teacher. But the Foundations test looks VERY challenging (I have access to the pretest online) so I figured maybe I should take the Reading Specialist subject test. Originally I considered the 5-8th grade history subject test since my geeky memory retains historical facts. But I figured since I am already studying reading acquisition and other such skills maybe it would be better to just get into even more detail and take the Reading Specialist test which does allow me to teach reading in all grades.
Now our middle/high school does not have a separate reading program but I am guessing the test and skills could transfer to say teaching English. Not certain of course but I can only study for (and pay for) so many tests!
Since I am committed to our town's school system I am trying to do what is best for them and ME! All this reading knowledge is certainly helping me with my little kindergartners and it has made me a better substitute for older kids so I am certainly benefiting from it.
But oh Lordy it is HARD. The other tests I had to study very little for, especially since my psychology of learning class was still fresh in my mind. But this reading stuff....while I have the gist of it, the test requires much more than that. I have to KNOW this stuff. Now I see why people pay the hundreds of dollars to take the course offered on taking the test!
Every day for twenty minutes to two hours, I have been studying. I started by downloading the test objectives for both tests: things like "understanding the role of phonics in reading development" and "understand how to apply reading comprehension skills and strategies to informational/expository texts."
Now each of these objectives has a paragraph of information to go along with them. Every paragraph could be a three day college lesson. Much of the info I can look up easily online of course. Things like what a K-W-L chart is and when it would be useful. What onset rimes are and how and why to teach them. Phonological awareness, etc. other things go in and out of my mind without sticking like stupid mean median and mode. Obviously I need to remember standard deviation and other such mathy things but of course I do not!
Some things however I have found difficult to get information on line like how to teach English Language learners.That sort of thing is new to regular classroom teachers so finding the information is a separate challenge from learning it.
Did I mention I am still working and parenting through this whole test cramming business? I have never learned how to not exceed my limits until I am already exceeding them.
Thankfully I do love learning new things and much of the information is more about connecting formal names and techniques to what I have already been doing in the classroom and with my own children for years.
The biggest trouble I am having is keeping ahead of the anxiety and panic. The tests are already paid for, pass them or not there is no point in worrying. But I am unable to let go of the fretting. Donnie's long term out of work status looms large. Unless the Federal government grants another unemployment extension on December 5th we will no longer be able to pay our bills.
He misses the extension benefits by 5 days. If he ran out by December 1st he would be all set because there are monies for those folks. But 5 days later, zilch. The Dems and Repubs both say they want to extend benefits but of course are fighting over where the money will come from. They also would like to take their extended holiday vacation because they are exhausted from the elections, so they may shelve any further decision until after the New Year.
What are we to do then? Not just us, what are all the long term unemployed suppose to do about groceries and heat and mortgage payments.....
I have already given the kids the heads up. As of Dec 5th no more home phone or TV. We will continue as long as we can with Internet and cell phones as they seem critical... for the past year they have not asked for a single 'buy me ' thing except when absolutely nec. They have worked hard to remember to shut off their lights, wash clothes only when there is a full load, and wear a sweater to keep the heat low. They have done their part.....
The older chickens will go (except for a few favs. this will save feed costs over the winter.... each day I look at our budget and think of where else to cut or what else to do. From October to April I worked 3 parttime jobs to cover gaps, until my injury cut that down to one. I do not feel my health is up to that again, and do the studying and patrenting and and and........
We ask everyone we know.....heard of any cabinet jobs, anything? Anything for Don? I really wish I could just let it go and focus on the hard work of studying. I know stressing will not make anything better. Arggge if the governenment would just come through before the holidays and then maybe a job with the new year for him, oh that would be sweet.
So for now my spare time is spent in studying and trying not to panic. Don's spare time is in tightneing up the house the best he can for winter, sending out resumes, and writing letters to the Senate and the House. I wish I could let go of the resentment I feel at the thought that they might go on vacaiotn and screw our family and so many others. They really hurt people this summer when they took their summer break and did this to those who ran out in June. The thought that they have another break coming up when all my husband ever had was a job with 2 weeks vacation until no job existed, well it is hard not too get good and mad.
Ok gotta try and let it go. Tonight after my gym workout I will do some yoga and really focus on letting go of things I have no control over.....
I will think about all the fun new things I am learning. I will thank God how lucky I am that we do own our own home and our bills are caught up, that we have nice kids, that after 27 years we are still in this together even if it does feel like we are on quicksand right now. I will look to the good and work to let go what I cannot control.....
Now our middle/high school does not have a separate reading program but I am guessing the test and skills could transfer to say teaching English. Not certain of course but I can only study for (and pay for) so many tests!
Since I am committed to our town's school system I am trying to do what is best for them and ME! All this reading knowledge is certainly helping me with my little kindergartners and it has made me a better substitute for older kids so I am certainly benefiting from it.
But oh Lordy it is HARD. The other tests I had to study very little for, especially since my psychology of learning class was still fresh in my mind. But this reading stuff....while I have the gist of it, the test requires much more than that. I have to KNOW this stuff. Now I see why people pay the hundreds of dollars to take the course offered on taking the test!
Every day for twenty minutes to two hours, I have been studying. I started by downloading the test objectives for both tests: things like "understanding the role of phonics in reading development" and "understand how to apply reading comprehension skills and strategies to informational/expository texts."
Now each of these objectives has a paragraph of information to go along with them. Every paragraph could be a three day college lesson. Much of the info I can look up easily online of course. Things like what a K-W-L chart is and when it would be useful. What onset rimes are and how and why to teach them. Phonological awareness, etc. other things go in and out of my mind without sticking like stupid mean median and mode. Obviously I need to remember standard deviation and other such mathy things but of course I do not!
Some things however I have found difficult to get information on line like how to teach English Language learners.That sort of thing is new to regular classroom teachers so finding the information is a separate challenge from learning it.
Did I mention I am still working and parenting through this whole test cramming business? I have never learned how to not exceed my limits until I am already exceeding them.
Thankfully I do love learning new things and much of the information is more about connecting formal names and techniques to what I have already been doing in the classroom and with my own children for years.
The biggest trouble I am having is keeping ahead of the anxiety and panic. The tests are already paid for, pass them or not there is no point in worrying. But I am unable to let go of the fretting. Donnie's long term out of work status looms large. Unless the Federal government grants another unemployment extension on December 5th we will no longer be able to pay our bills.
He misses the extension benefits by 5 days. If he ran out by December 1st he would be all set because there are monies for those folks. But 5 days later, zilch. The Dems and Repubs both say they want to extend benefits but of course are fighting over where the money will come from. They also would like to take their extended holiday vacation because they are exhausted from the elections, so they may shelve any further decision until after the New Year.
What are we to do then? Not just us, what are all the long term unemployed suppose to do about groceries and heat and mortgage payments.....
I have already given the kids the heads up. As of Dec 5th no more home phone or TV. We will continue as long as we can with Internet and cell phones as they seem critical... for the past year they have not asked for a single 'buy me ' thing except when absolutely nec. They have worked hard to remember to shut off their lights, wash clothes only when there is a full load, and wear a sweater to keep the heat low. They have done their part.....
The older chickens will go (except for a few favs. this will save feed costs over the winter.... each day I look at our budget and think of where else to cut or what else to do. From October to April I worked 3 parttime jobs to cover gaps, until my injury cut that down to one. I do not feel my health is up to that again, and do the studying and patrenting and and and........
We ask everyone we know.....heard of any cabinet jobs, anything? Anything for Don? I really wish I could just let it go and focus on the hard work of studying. I know stressing will not make anything better. Arggge if the governenment would just come through before the holidays and then maybe a job with the new year for him, oh that would be sweet.
So for now my spare time is spent in studying and trying not to panic. Don's spare time is in tightneing up the house the best he can for winter, sending out resumes, and writing letters to the Senate and the House. I wish I could let go of the resentment I feel at the thought that they might go on vacaiotn and screw our family and so many others. They really hurt people this summer when they took their summer break and did this to those who ran out in June. The thought that they have another break coming up when all my husband ever had was a job with 2 weeks vacation until no job existed, well it is hard not too get good and mad.
Ok gotta try and let it go. Tonight after my gym workout I will do some yoga and really focus on letting go of things I have no control over.....
I will think about all the fun new things I am learning. I will thank God how lucky I am that we do own our own home and our bills are caught up, that we have nice kids, that after 27 years we are still in this together even if it does feel like we are on quicksand right now. I will look to the good and work to let go what I cannot control.....
Thursday, November 04, 2010
Planet Fitness
I have had my Planet Fitness membership for 2 years. Tim got it for me as a Christmas gift the first time, and Don and Tim renewed it again this year.
I was initially disappointed in the gym because it had no pool. About 5 years ago we had a one year family membership at the Y and they had free childcare plus free family swims. I also had company probably once week while I worked out, as either Don, Yon, Julie, or Jamie came along. The Y was a great place to learn how to use all the equipment and they also offered classes which appealed to my gregarious nature. But the Y was not in our price range, this time around.
My next choice was the ritzy gym here in town where all the cool people go. It does not have a pool either but it does offer classes, looks amazing, and lots of fun people go there. Plus it is right up the street. But again the price was way outta my league.
So I went with the 'cheap gym' or as Donnie likes to call it, the no frills gym. It took sometime to get use to. First of all the staff is neither particularly friendly nor overly helpful. At the Y there is always someone walking around happy to assist or offer advice. Here the staff stays mostly behind the desk chatting with one another and sometimes remembering to greet you when you come in. I have never found anyone on staff walking around acting like they were interested in helping. As a matter of fact one time a staff guy who was giving a private personal training session was loud and somewhat rude because I was on the equipment he wanted his client to learn about!
Also there are many many folks there who are really into fitness, with huge biceps and incredible bodies, and I am just talking about the women! For a round person this large display of rippling muscles can be a bit discouraging. To add to the angst, the ripped bodies combined with the sunbed tans and fake boobs is positively disconcerting.
But once you get past the 'you're on your own' feeling you begin to notice something else. Every day, no matter what the time, dozens and dozens of people care enough about their health to go to the gym.
The no frills gym is always crowded. I am guessing they have around 75 aerobics machines you know the kind, treadmills, elliptical, rowing, bikes, steppers. Almost every single machine is occupied during high traffic times and even the slow times see more than half in use.
The larger weight lifting room is almost entirely filled with guys. But if you are brave enough to enter it, no one bothers you. As a matter of fact the big muscle bound guys are more than happy to offer assistance if you ask.
The first year I went Jan through April and then took my exercise outdoors which really is more fun. But I went back late fall from Oct again through April when my injury curtailed my entire life, not just my workout.
Since my injury however I have missed the gym with its sturdy machines and comforting constants. Math is big in gyms and you can measure time, distance, weight lifted, etc on those machines.
Of course the 'calories' burned counter is way overly optimistic. But it is nice to be able to keep track numerically how far I have run or walked or how much my quads could lift(a lot) or my triceps could pump (practically nothing!)
I have been back on the aerobics machines and while not up to full speed I am still getting my heart and lungs pumping away. Next week the PT will go over the machines with me although of course I could start with them now. But there is a reassurance in knowing that if I wait for her she can make certain I am doing things 'correctly'.
I still have not found the proper ear piece that stays in my ears without broadcasting my Ipod's music to everyone around me. Also I really wish I could read while doing the aerobics, but my vision and glasses will not work as they should when I am on the treadmill or elliptical. In addition I have to be extraordinarily careful when working out and focusing on the TV.( my neck!) I can walk outside for hours, literlaly hours and not get bored. But those machuines have a built in boring mechanism and so TV and music keep me going.
Last night however as I was sweating away, I noticed a couple of the muscle ladies, who spend hours there every day. One was really into her zone, oblivious to everyone as she pushed her body. But the other stopped to help someone with a question and then later I overheard her giving encouragment to a newbie on the treadmill.
It would be nice to be able to go to a gym with a pool, or to be surrounded by family and friends while I workout. But my 'no frills gym', Planet Fitness, well it is not a bad place to be, especially after everything my poor body has been through.
I really want to get back into tip top shape and be back to losing weight, holiday season or not. It is nice to pay only a small price and be able to go to a decent enough place and get my sweat on.
I was initially disappointed in the gym because it had no pool. About 5 years ago we had a one year family membership at the Y and they had free childcare plus free family swims. I also had company probably once week while I worked out, as either Don, Yon, Julie, or Jamie came along. The Y was a great place to learn how to use all the equipment and they also offered classes which appealed to my gregarious nature. But the Y was not in our price range, this time around.
My next choice was the ritzy gym here in town where all the cool people go. It does not have a pool either but it does offer classes, looks amazing, and lots of fun people go there. Plus it is right up the street. But again the price was way outta my league.
So I went with the 'cheap gym' or as Donnie likes to call it, the no frills gym. It took sometime to get use to. First of all the staff is neither particularly friendly nor overly helpful. At the Y there is always someone walking around happy to assist or offer advice. Here the staff stays mostly behind the desk chatting with one another and sometimes remembering to greet you when you come in. I have never found anyone on staff walking around acting like they were interested in helping. As a matter of fact one time a staff guy who was giving a private personal training session was loud and somewhat rude because I was on the equipment he wanted his client to learn about!
Also there are many many folks there who are really into fitness, with huge biceps and incredible bodies, and I am just talking about the women! For a round person this large display of rippling muscles can be a bit discouraging. To add to the angst, the ripped bodies combined with the sunbed tans and fake boobs is positively disconcerting.
But once you get past the 'you're on your own' feeling you begin to notice something else. Every day, no matter what the time, dozens and dozens of people care enough about their health to go to the gym.
The no frills gym is always crowded. I am guessing they have around 75 aerobics machines you know the kind, treadmills, elliptical, rowing, bikes, steppers. Almost every single machine is occupied during high traffic times and even the slow times see more than half in use.
The larger weight lifting room is almost entirely filled with guys. But if you are brave enough to enter it, no one bothers you. As a matter of fact the big muscle bound guys are more than happy to offer assistance if you ask.
The first year I went Jan through April and then took my exercise outdoors which really is more fun. But I went back late fall from Oct again through April when my injury curtailed my entire life, not just my workout.
Since my injury however I have missed the gym with its sturdy machines and comforting constants. Math is big in gyms and you can measure time, distance, weight lifted, etc on those machines.
Of course the 'calories' burned counter is way overly optimistic. But it is nice to be able to keep track numerically how far I have run or walked or how much my quads could lift(a lot) or my triceps could pump (practically nothing!)
I have been back on the aerobics machines and while not up to full speed I am still getting my heart and lungs pumping away. Next week the PT will go over the machines with me although of course I could start with them now. But there is a reassurance in knowing that if I wait for her she can make certain I am doing things 'correctly'.
I still have not found the proper ear piece that stays in my ears without broadcasting my Ipod's music to everyone around me. Also I really wish I could read while doing the aerobics, but my vision and glasses will not work as they should when I am on the treadmill or elliptical. In addition I have to be extraordinarily careful when working out and focusing on the TV.( my neck!) I can walk outside for hours, literlaly hours and not get bored. But those machuines have a built in boring mechanism and so TV and music keep me going.
Last night however as I was sweating away, I noticed a couple of the muscle ladies, who spend hours there every day. One was really into her zone, oblivious to everyone as she pushed her body. But the other stopped to help someone with a question and then later I overheard her giving encouragment to a newbie on the treadmill.
It would be nice to be able to go to a gym with a pool, or to be surrounded by family and friends while I workout. But my 'no frills gym', Planet Fitness, well it is not a bad place to be, especially after everything my poor body has been through.
I really want to get back into tip top shape and be back to losing weight, holiday season or not. It is nice to pay only a small price and be able to go to a decent enough place and get my sweat on.
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